8/60

Bikram Kaimuki - class #66
4:30 pm w/ Jeremy

Really strong class today. Jeremy is always a good teacher, but when he is on his game he is exceptional. Today was one of those days. The group energy was cohesive and he led us through a flawless dialogue. It wasn't until the end of the class that I found out that it was the fourth class that he had taught for the day. I never would have guessed. The room was super hot but the class wasn't too big. I held the full time on many of the postures - most notably triangle and camel. It could be my mind playing tricks on me but it sure seemed like my body was thanking me for taking a day of rest.

I watched "Rock of Love Bus" on the DVR tonight. It is my favorite trash TV. I just can't get enough. Like one train wreck after another that I am compelled to watch in some sort of horrified fascination. Besides that I don't watch a lot of TV. (At least not until the new season of Entourage.) Movies on Netflix - yes. TV - not so much. Last week I watched "Vicky Christina Barcelona" twice. What a fabulous movie. I think that I will have to add that one to the collection. Next in my que is Milk which I also can't wait to see. Again, such are the silly little things that make me happy these days. ;))

I am gearing up for a double tomorrow so I am going to stop there.


Today's Weight: 212.0

Today's Food Choices:
coffee w/ vanilla syrup & soy milk
mango macademia nut pancakes
w/ fresh strawberries on top
(11:30 am - Cafe Mulvadi)
vegetable briyani
vegetable samosa
vegetable korma curry
(8 pm - Cafe Taj Mahal)

No class for me today. Which means I have another double to do in addition to the ones I already scheduled in order to make 60 classes in 60 days. =o(

I was planning to go to the 6:30 w/ KEvo. But had a friend invite me to dinner and to check out the new Target. At first I declined, but as the day wore on I changed my mind. I guess the pull of shopping w/ girlfriends got the best of me.

Hawaii just *finally* got its first 2 Target stores last month and there's been so much hype. Maybe it's cause I haven't been a regular Target shopper for the last several years. Maybe I just find ridiculously great bargains when I visit the mainland. Maybe this store is too new to have much clearance stuff yet. Maybe they are still in the process of stocking cuter, hipper merchandise. Maybe Target has just gone downhill. Regardless it was a big disappointment. It was nice to hang out with friends. But I sorta spent the whole evening wishing that I'd gone to yoga.

Today's Weight: 211.0

Today's Food Choices:
coffee w/ vanilla syrup & soy milk
glazed doughnut w/ chocolate filling
(10 am - The Patisirrie)
vegetable quiche
fruit salad - pineapple, melon, grapes
(12 pm - work)
green salad w/ carrots, tomatoes, onions, cucumbers
poppy seed roll w/ butter
(3 pm - work)
vermiccelli w/ veggie spring rolls, lettuce, & sprouts
(6:30 pm - Pho One)

7/60

Bikram Kaimuki - class #65
8:15 pm

I've only had this teacher (who will remain nameless) once before and didn't really like her class. Tonight was no different. Her energy is low and her voice is monotone. Her cues aren't very strong so everybody kind of goes into and out of postures using their own timing. By the time we made it to the floor I was pretty annoyed.

But then, laying in savasana, it hit me. To my warped mind she sounded a little like Mr. Garrison from South PArk. After I made that connection I had a hard time keeping a straight face. I kept mentally adding "Mmm Kay?" to the end of each sentence and just about cracking up. I am sure she is a lovely person but her style simply doesn't jive with mine. I'll do what I can to avoid her class but try to make the best of it if/when I ever have her as a teacher again.

I had a doctor's appointment this morning and my weight was actually 206 on their scale. 206!!! That's 5 pounds lower than mine and fully clothed at that. I am still going by my scale cause that's what I've been using all along. But it certainly brightened my day.

And with that I will sign off cause I'm not feeling very yogi-like.

Today's Weight: 211.0

Today's Food Choices:
burrito w/ black beans, rice, lettuce, salsa, guacamole
served covered w/ enchilada sauce
(1 pm - work)
Itoen green Tea
2x Hershey's 100 calorie packs
(3 pm - work)

6/60

Bikram Kaimuki - class #64
6:30 pm w/ Michele

Tonight's class was freekin' HOT. Michele doesn't open the doors very much either. So I had one of those classes where I felt that my skin was melting off. I felt dizzy during several of the postures and I even contemplated sitting out camel completely. But then my work ethic got the best of me and I tried the pose for about half of the time in each set.

During class Michele told us that when she got pregnant with her son she stopped doing Bikram because she had, had a previous miscarriage. She let herself eat whatever she wanted and gained 60 lbs. Now Michele is not a big girl. If I had to guess I'd say maybe 5'4". And I think that I've mentioned before that she has *the* most incredible body. Like she could model Brazilian bikinis and get paid for it if she wanted to.

She told us that once she went back to doing Bikram every day she lost her baby weight in 4 months! This give me solid hope. I want to lose another 60 lbs or so. And the fact that she looks this good after losing 60 lbs makes me even more confident about what I might be able to accomplish with my own body through losing the total of 80-90 lbs that is my ultimate goal.

Back to meditation #25 and the idea of humility. Gates says that, "Our postures become the embodiment of the exquisite balance between holding on and letting go, action and nonaction, ambition and restraint." He is so spot on with this. I am working on finding this balance in every class. And I'm already seeing the effects spill over into my daily life. This is after just 6-7 weeks of regular practice. I am excited to see what will happen a year into it and 5 years and 10 and even more.


Today's Weight: 211.0

TOTAL OF 25 POUNDS LOST SO FAR



Today's Food Choices:
fresh pineapple
(10 am - work)
Teeccino w/ vanilla soy milk
(11:30 - work)
3 slices veggie pizza w/ garlic butter
(1:30 pm - work)
Snickers bar
bag of Fritos
Itoen green tea
(3:30 pm - work)
small bowl of rice w/ Earth Balance
(8:30 pm - home)

5/60

Bikram Kaimuki - class #63
8:15 pm w/ Kevo

Tough class tonight for me. Kevo sped through the dialogue cause it was St. Patrick's Day, the class was small, and I'm sure he wanted to go out and join the revelry. The limited rest between postures made it much more cardio-intensive for me. But I think my bigger issue was too much sugar again today. I felt nauseous and out of breath throughout the class. And I really wanted to sit out several postures - especially when it came to spine strengthen series. But I did not. ;))

I am pretty spent and still need to study more. So I'm going to cut this short. More insights on Meditation #25 to come another day.


Today's Weight: 213.0


Today's Food Choices:
cafe mocha w/ soy milk
glazed doughnut w/ chocolate frosting
(10:00 am - The Patisserie)
fruit salad - pineapple, grapes, melon
Cranberry Jubilee trail mix
(12 pm - work)
green salad w/ carrots, cucumbers, tomatoes, onions
sesame seed roll
(4 pm - work)
hot chocolate w/ soy milk
slice of coconut cake
(6:30 pm - Coffee Talk)

4/60

MEDITATION #25

Bikram Kaimuki - class #62
8:15 pm w/ Michele

Good class again tonight. Very hot and steamy. I felt strong and even got a compliment from Michele on my standing bow. Chatted it up in the lobby after with a couple fellow yogi's - which I don't usually do. Michele asked how much weight I've lost and told me how great I was doing. Which, of course, I already know. But hearing it really made my night.

This is right in line with something that I have already been thinking about for the last couple of days. Sometimes I re-read my blog and feel like I sound terribly vain and ego-centered. I know, in all honesty, that I am certainly neither of those things. But sometimes I almost feel guilty for the glee I feel when I look in the mirror and see the slimmer, fitter body staring back at me.

It's sort of like I'm afraid that I will turn into some kind of brainless Barbie-doll type if I continue to lose weight and shape up. Yes - I do know how completely and utterly ridiculous that is. But somewhere in my childhood or adolescence I got it stuck in my head that it was bad or at least silly to want to look good.

Major news flash - I DO want to look good. We all do. And on the one had I don't think there's anything wrong with that. But on the other hand I feel on some deep level that I shouldn't care so much about my outward appearance. This is something I struggle with. Weird, huh? But also pretty typical of the contradictory messages we are bombarded with from the time we are very young.

That brings me to today's meditation which is about pride. Gates talks about how putting truthfulness into practice during yoga is an exercise in humility. But he also says that humility has two sides. There is the letting go of the good as well as the bad. But the aspect he discusses that really hit me is that humility is also the awareness that we cannot afford to play small.

I feel that this is sort of what I've been doing. For the last several years I've been kind of just hanging out. I've used the extra weight as an excuse not to go out into the world and interact more with people. I've used food to comfort me instead of dealing with my emotions head on. Today's Daily Om deals with this exact issue - using outside influences to numb your feelings. WOW. I am really getting a double or even triple whammy here. I think that I should revist this meditation again tomorrow because there is so much for me to contemplate and sit with.


Today's Food Choices:
cafe mocha w/ soy milk
glazed doughnut w/ chocolate filling
(10:00 am - The Patisserie)
green salad w/ tomatoes, carrots, cucumbers, & onions
(2 pm - work)
8 oz Kombucha
(5:30 pm - work)

3/60

Bikram Kaimuki - class #61
6:30 pm w/ Noa

I got another body wrap today. Didn't do measurements, but I feel really slim. In yoga class I couldn't help noticing that the reflection staring back at me looked much thinner. ;))

Noa taught a great class. She is a tough little girl. She's really big on staying calm and in control between postures. I've often witnessed her call people out for drinking water and wiping their faces too much. Personally, I appreciate her reminders to "just breathe and act like nothing happened" especially after giving my all in a tough posture. I had a solid class. I even held both sets of Camel for the full time. And I almost held Standing Bow-Pulling for the full time in second set. Ahh, the small things that make me happy these days.

Speaking of which, I had a delightful lunch with my friend, Suzy, today. And yesterday I spent a lovely afternoon with my friend, Joy, who accompanied my to get my "nose job" as she likes to call it. I am feeling so blessed to have these two wonderful ladies in my life.

But now I really must study because I have an exam Wednesday. So I'm going to cut this entry short.

Aloha, Thanks for reading, and Namaste.



Today's Weight: 214.0


Today's Food Choices:
1 banana
Itoen green tea
(10:00 am - 7-11)
ginger soup
Thai vegetables w/ rice
Thai basil w/ red chili & tofu
(12 pm - Phuket Thai)
1 small brownie
(5:30 pm - home)
3 slices veggie pizza w/ garlic sauce but no cheese
(9:30 pm - Papa John's)

2/60

MEDITATION #24

Bikram Kaimuki - class #60
11 am w/ Kevo

I had a great class today. Yes, Kevo is still my favorite even though he's the hardest. The more I take his class the better I get. It's not that the other teachers don't help me improve or try to push us in class. It's just that I always seem to work harder w/ Kevo.

In other news, I got my nose pierced today. It was kind of a whim, although I've thought about doing it on and off for quite a while. I wanted to celebrate losing 20 lbs for good. This is a nice little reminder that I am returning to my old self but at the same time I'm embarking on a journey to a newer, truer version of me. It is also a tribute to my funky and creative and rebellious side. And it was totally no big deal. It did bleed a bit cause it's on the face. But in all, was not that different from piercing your ear. I got a small diamond-looking clear gem stud. Very tasteful and delicate. I LOVE IT!!!

Having the courage to get my nose done made me decide that I'm *finally* going to bite the bullet and get the stay human logo tattoo on my ankle that I've wanted for years now. I think that I'll get it done when I reach 40 lbs lost. Hopefully, that will coincide with my trip to San Francisco after this 60 day challenge is finished. The tattoo will be my next little reward for myself and memento of the new phase of my life I'm beginning. I'm a little scared but also very excited.

Today's meditation talks about letting go of pretense and telling the truth about ourselves as part of the concept of satya. Gates speaks about, "holy moments when we come out of hiding and allow ourselves to simply be truthful with another human being without trying to be cool." I think that yoga helps with the ability to just be without pretense. But I still find myself needing to be cool. I do strive to be authentic above all else. But some days even that is a struggle. Interesting the many layers to an idea so seemingly simple and straightforward as "truth".


Today's Weight: 215.5 - before yoga
Today's Weight: 212.5 - after yoga ;))

TOTAL OF 23.5 POUNDS LOST SO FAR



Today's Food Choices:
green & peppermint combo tea
(10 am - home)
spicy veggie roll
tempura veggie roll
tempura shrimp roll
1/2 California roll
(2:30 pm - Sushi Man)
scoop raspberry sorbet
(4:30 pm - Bubbies)
2 glasses champagne
(7 pm - home)
pineapple, spinach, acai, orange juice smoothie
(9 pm - home)

1/60

Bikram Kaimuki - class #59
6:30 pm w/ Kevo

Well it's official. Tonight I started my first ever 60 Day Challenge. I also just found out that my sister and her family will be coming to Maui the last week of April. Which means I'll have to bank some doubles so that I don't have to worry about yoga when I go over to meet up with them for a long weekend. No matter. I am psyched to see them and I am psyched to complete this challenge. I've just got to plan ahead from day one.

I haven't had Kevo as a teacher in a while. And tonight's class still went surprising well. I didn't hold the super long version of camel. But I did try my best in all of the postures. I even held his long version of all 3 parts of Awkward - so I was proud of myself for that. And I wasn't completely dead tired by the time we hit the floor - so I must be learning to pace myself better. I may try to make his class again tomorrow. I sort of missed being pushed past my limits.

Looking at my food choices I just realized that I didn't eat any vegetables today. How did I let that happen? Wow. I really need to make sure that I get in at least one big green salad per day. I know my body needs it. Maybe I'll make a green smoothie tomorrow morning before I head out to yoga to try to start making up for the lack of live enzymes today.

It's been a long day so I think I'm going to crash. I will go into the next day's meditation tomorrow. I figure it'd better wait until I'm a little bit more articulate.

Aloha & Namaste


Today's Weight: 216.5


Today's Food Choices:
cafe mocha w/ soy milk
glazed doughnut w/ chocolate filling
(10:00 am The Patisserie)
fruit salad - pineapple, melon, grapes
3 oatmeal cookies
(1 pm - work)
bag of baked Chex Mix
Aloha Maid iced tea w/ lemon
(4 pm - work)
microwave popcorn
(9 pm - home)

MEDITATION #23 (RE-REDUX)

I took a sick day from work today. I woke up all achy and feverish. Thought I might be coming down with something but it turned out just to be the return of my monthly friend. I've been crampy and bloated and really low energy all day. So tonight I decided to have a glass of wine or two and skip yoga. I don't think I could handle a Kevo class right now.

I have decided to start my first ever 60 day challenge tomorrow. Why wait a week til St. Patrick's Day? Time is of the essence. If I feel strong I'll keep going for a total of 64 days straight before my trip to the mainland. The goal is to make at least 120 classes prior to leaving. 60+ added to the 58 I've already completed for the year. Then I will plan to do 4 classes while I'm gone - most likely 2 at El Cerrito and 2 at San Rafael.

I am excited. I think that right now I really need the discipline that committing to a 60 day challenge entails. And I appreciate the advice and well wishes from those of you who have completed your own challenge. ;))

Back to meditation #23 in Gates' book. I've been thinking a lot over the last several days about being truthful in thought, word, and deed. This proves to be an area of difficulty for me. Which just means that I've got to work harder at it and give it more attention. I am noticing more when I'm not being completely honest or authentic - so I guess that's the first step.


Today's Food Choices:
coffee w/ soy milk & vanilla syrup
kona chocolate chip pancakes
(1:30 am Cafe Mulvadi)
breakfast potatoes w/ salsa & guacamole
(3 pm - home)
2 glasses pinot grigio
vegetarian samosa
vegetarian pakoras
vegetarian padum
(8 pm - Cafe Taj Mahal)