MEDITATION #8

Bikram Kaimuki - class #42
9:00 am w/ Noa

When I got up this morning I was thinking that I'd go for a double, but now I'm just not feeling it. Noa's class this morning was difficult for me. It was really crowded and I was getting annoyed by every little thing. The lady next to me sighing and constantly wiping her face. The girl behind me hitting my feet every time she got ready to do a situp. The horrible, rotten-milk smell that seemed to be coming from the carpet directly beneath my mat. Even Noa moving around on the stage and blocking my view of the mirror. It got to the point where I finally realized that all these people weren't trying to be assholes on purpose and that it had to be me. And I tried to let it go. But it was just one of those days when I couldn't do it. Oh well. I was hoping to head back for Tom's class and redeem myself, but I've had a low-grade headache all afternoon. So I think I'm better off skipping it.

I also think that I need to let go of the 60 in 60 goal. At least for now. I have been doing really well. I have not missed more than one day in a row since I started this practice. I'm 5 classes behind right now and don't think that I'll be able to pull off 5 doubles in the next 2 weeks. Not to say that I won't attempt to do this again. But for the time being I need to acknowledge the tremendous gains that I have made and focus on getting rid of this cold once and for all.

Today's meditation is about letting go of the things that hold us back. Gates says that when we make a commitment to our practice, then the obstacles to our progress suddenly come into clear focus. I do feel this happening to me. That is one of the reasons I realize that I have got to give up dairy. I am not going to be the healthy, vibrant, yoga goddess that I know I am capable of becoming while still eating gobs of cheese all the time. Dairy makes me foggy. It causes frequent colds and makes losing weight a lot more difficult. And I am sure that there will be other things that I discover I need to relinquish as the time goes by. The yoga practice kind of puts everything into perspective for me. It gives me a new standard to live up to.


Today's Weight: 219.5 - before yoga
Today's Weight: 217.0 - after yoga ;))


Today's Food Choices:
1 apple
24 oz pineapple, banana, spinach, mint, orange juice smoothie
4 piece falafalel w/ pita bread, hummus and hot sauce
large portion of garlic fries
Greek salad - no cheese
15 baby carrots